Wow, I sure wrote quite the post the other day. I felt a little confused over the place D/s has in our relationship. Scared is probably the better term; 24/7 sounds hardcore and scary, to me. But in retrospect, I realize I asked the wrong question. That’s what roo-roo said, anyway, and he’s right. Besides, I answered my own question right in my post: “With time, I’ve come to sort of admit that our relationship is 24/7, or at least some aspects of it are, since I basically decide when and how we play.”

No, I think the real issue is to find the correct balance, as web said. I really like the way roo-roo puts it, too:

“24/7 doesn’t have to mean that d/s flavors every single interaction. It can be a constant background hum which occasionally gets louder and fades.

Rather than focusing on whether you’re 24/7 or not, I think it’s best to look at where each of you want this to go. How do you want things to be? What do you want to explore or get a tiny taste of? What have you tried that you want more of? These are the things you may want to look at rather than the “game vs. lifestyle” question.”

And this is something we haven’t really done. We just let things flow as they will. I imagine balance will be achieved naturally, with time… Or will it? I sure hope so because I can’t seem to bring myself to set rules and protocols and define clear limits. It would take a lot of fun out of it, for me. And it sounds like too much work

In my post, I also did sorta kinda mention that D/s shouldn’t be a solution to relationship issues. I said: “As for my insecurity, I told him I’m not sure domination is the answer. I want the relationship to work well on its own, not rely on D/s or something like that. I told him he can help me feel secure with his feelings for me, which he indeed does.”

Well, the next day I happened to read a wonderfully written post on just this subject, written by Devastating Yet Inconsequential. I mention it because she has a much clearer way with words than I and her post is worth reading (as is the rest of her blog).

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On another note, Boy Toy and I took a few pictures tonight. As a matter of fact, I took a few naked pictures of him this weekend, while he was kneeling in front of me for his daily 10 minutes of submission. But those are for my eyes only.

The pictures we took tonight, though, are meant for my next HNT. I had just finished training and I was hungry, which means I was grumpy. Poor Boy Toy! I really did my best not to be too bitchy. But it seems like none of his ideas pleased me. First he had me sitting on the cold, cold washing machine with nothing but a skimpy short skirt on. Ouch! Then he thought we should do something with a little weight (for weight lifting). Something about training. In the end, I opted for an equally skimpy skirt, this one tight and shiny. And socks, knee high socks. Stay tuned!