Comments on: It begins http://www.kinkunleashed.com/2008/07/20/it-begins/ Ramblings of a playful girl Fri, 30 Jul 2010 19:04:05 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0 By: Elle http://www.kinkunleashed.com/2008/07/20/it-begins/comment-page-1/#comment-4 Elle Tue, 22 Jul 2008 22:25:07 +0000 http://www.kinkunleashed.com/?p=5#comment-4 Yes, I do agree that if it's important for someone, they should talk about it sooner rather than later. In our case, Boy Toy told me he was into kink even before we ever dated. We met in a bar and remained acquaintances for about a year before we got together... Right from the start we talked online and it's one of the first things he told me. See, because he's been involved in the fetish/kink scene, people know this about him and he wanted to warn me: "hang out with me and people will associate you with me, they will think you are into that kind of stuff". But that sure wasn't enough to stop me from befriending him. Later, when we started talking about having a fling (because he was so careful, we TALKED about it first haha), he did tell me this was an important element for him, in any serious relationship. Guess he just wanted me to know this, to sort of cover his ass in case nothing came of our fling ;) There were other personal reasons too why we decided, at first, that we would just be "fuck friends". Turns out though that he really knew how to appeal to my playfull side without overwhelming or scaring me, and I really got into it. A few months later he started calling me his girlfriend, and here we are now :D Hmm, this got rather long, maybe I should have made a post :P Yes, I do agree that if it’s important for someone, they should talk about it sooner rather than later.

In our case, Boy Toy told me he was into kink even before we ever dated. We met in a bar and remained acquaintances for about a year before we got together… Right from the start we talked online and it’s one of the first things he told me. See, because he’s been involved in the fetish/kink scene, people know this about him and he wanted to warn me: “hang out with me and people will associate you with me, they will think you are into that kind of stuff”. But that sure wasn’t enough to stop me from befriending him.

Later, when we started talking about having a fling (because he was so careful, we TALKED about it first haha), he did tell me this was an important element for him, in any serious relationship. Guess he just wanted me to know this, to sort of cover his ass in case nothing came of our fling ;) There were other personal reasons too why we decided, at first, that we would just be “fuck friends”.

Turns out though that he really knew how to appeal to my playfull side without overwhelming or scaring me, and I really got into it. A few months later he started calling me his girlfriend, and here we are now :D

Hmm, this got rather long, maybe I should have made a post :P

]]> By: Tom Allen http://www.kinkunleashed.com/2008/07/20/it-begins/comment-page-1/#comment-3 Tom Allen Tue, 22 Jul 2008 21:51:21 +0000 http://www.kinkunleashed.com/?p=5#comment-3 Years ago I read an article from somebody who decided that he would get the "I'm kinky" talk out of the way right from the start, like by the 2nd or 3rd date. He'd discovered that by waiting until, say, six months into dating, then it wasn't being fair if his partner was turned off and he decided to leave because of that; because, of course, if she wasn't interested, then he <i>would</i> leave, because it would be even less fair down the road. I don't know if the 2nd date is the best time, but I do agree that early in the relationship is essential to get it out of the way. Glad to see that the two of you managed to talk about it without either of you being too embarrassed or shy. Years ago I read an article from somebody who decided that he would get the “I’m kinky” talk out of the way right from the start, like by the 2nd or 3rd date. He’d discovered that by waiting until, say, six months into dating, then it wasn’t being fair if his partner was turned off and he decided to leave because of that; because, of course, if she wasn’t interested, then he would leave, because it would be even less fair down the road.

I don’t know if the 2nd date is the best time, but I do agree that early in the relationship is essential to get it out of the way. Glad to see that the two of you managed to talk about it without either of you being too embarrassed or shy.

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