That's right, a little tushy exposure before I'm off with my Boy Toy :D Tom set the mood this morning, with his butt picture. If you read my recent post Photoshoot with a happy ending, you'll have noticed that Boy Toy and I had a little photoshoot fun, last Saturday. Well, here's hoping you'll find it paid off:

Tonight, I'm excited! In a couple of days, Boy Toy and I are leaving on a road trip. We'll be doing a lot of driving, even some boating. We will see my family. We will spend time in a cottage by the sea. We will also see some of his family. All in all, we'll be gone about a week and a half. So you will surely forgive me if I don't post as much for a little while... I will try to post, but I can't promise anything. This is, after all, my vacation. A well deserved one, and I just can't wait. When we were first planning this trip, I was thinking we'd make it a kinky one. There could be "trip rules" or something. We could bring a few toys along. As it turns out, I've got nothing planned. I toyed with the idea, my mind kept going back to it, but I just couldn't come up with anything. After all, this is Boy Toy's vacation, too. As for toys, when I mentioned it to Boy Toy recently, he said "What if someone goes through our luggage?" I was sceptical. No one ever goes through my luggage. It’s really not like my parents to peek in my suitcase to make sure I’ve got nothing naughty in there. Guess he was just scared of what I might want to bring. On that note, though, I AM open to suggestions. Any of you ever had a nice, kinky trip and want to share some pointers? What could be good trip rules? I thought about telling Boy Toy he isn’t allowed to be a brat and he isn’t allowed to work, but those two might be hard on him… Keep in mind, too, that this is sort of a family trip. My family. And Boy Toy will be meeting them for the first time. I imagine he doesn’t really feel like doing this while wearing a chastity device, right? Speaking of family and kink, this is something I’ve been thinking about, lately. Not that I want to be kinky with my family, get your mind out of the gutter! But they’ve got no idea. It’s none of their business, to be sure. But what if they found out? This is something I thought about briefly when I decided to start this blog, but what sparked a deeper reflection was something I’ve read online. I explained it to goodhubby, from The Chastity Experiment, in one of my comments to a post: Being found out IS kinda scary, isn't it? I stumbled across this blog recently, Girl with a one-track mind. She has had a sex-blog for years, millions of readers, made a book out of it, all anonymously. Then soon as the book comes out, some reporter finds out who she is and outs her. Imagine having to tell your parents about it? I joked to Boy Toy last weekend, told him we should tell our parents about my blog ;) In her case, though, she is quite lucky to have very open-minded parents. Happy for her! Mine are quite open-minded too and for some reason, I can just picture my dad laughing at the whole thing. Still, for now, I'll keep them in the dark... The situation is somewhat different with our friends. In the post I mentioned before, goodhubby (GH for short) is talking about the idea of friends knowing what's going on. He thinks the idea quite exciting, and it's funny, because Boy Toy is the same way. But our friends do know, in a way, as I explain to GH: For him and I, the situation is different in the sense that most of our friends are kinksters. Especially his, since he's been "in it" for years. But even some of mine, one guy in particular. They know we are kinky. I mean, there's a crop always lying around Boy Toy's place and when we have people over, it's quite common for the crop to come out and be used... We also went to a fetish event, once, with a few friends. Yet we have not told them about my blog, because them knowing the exact details of what we do is quite different than having a vague idea, isn't it? So. We're not "out" yet. I've shown my blog to one friend whom I trust very much. Boy Toy doesn't know him, has never met him, so that makes it a bit easier. We've talked about telling another of our friends. Well actually, that friend knows about my blog, but we haven't shown it to him. Like I told GH, it's one thing being known as kinky people, but telling our friends exactly what we do is something else...

Last Saturday afternoon, Boy Toy was smoking a cigarette, naked and kneeling in front of me. We were talking and I told him it was my belief that, with the right tone, he would obey pretty much anything I told him to do, that he wouldn’t question my instructions. To demonstrate my point, I said “Go put on the cock ring. Now.” He got up, rummaged through our toy box until he found it, and put it on. Wanting to know if the thing could fall off, I told him as a test, he would have to wear it all day.

Then we decided to take pictures for HNT posts, which you will be enjoying in the weeks to come. For the last series of pictures, I took out a flogger from the toy box, to use as accessory. For the very last pictures, Boy Toy lay on his back to get a different angle. I was standing up, one foot on each side of him, and his legs were slightly spread. I just couldn’t resist, I used this opportunity to start gently flogging his balls, which were still surrounded by the cock ring. He became nervous, afraid I would hurt him, so I told him, just tell me, if it hurts. The flogger is quite long, and, maybe due to my inexperience with it, I don’t think I could have hurt him with the thing. I playfully ran the leather strips between his legs, over his balls and over his cock, in between flogging him. It did not take long for him to become erect.

I was still standing over him, one leg on each side of him. I went down on my knees, straddling him. Me on top is pretty much our favourite position. When I felt he was about to come, I told him “Not now! Don’t come!” and slowed down. This is a little tricky because the fact that I order him around, like this, turns him on… It is my belief that it could be enough to push him over the edge. Not this time, though. He was good. After a little while, I came and this got him so worked up that he asked if he could come. I told him he could, but frankly, I think whatever I had said, it was too late for him. Maybe I should have said no, just for an opportunity to punish him ;)

He kept the cock ring on for a while still, but not the whole day as it was becoming sensitive and I let him take it off. I like playing the mean Dom, but in truth, it’s just a game. I don’t want my Boy Toy to be hurt.

Very early on with Boy Toy, we talked about domination and submission. He made no secret that he was of the submissive type, in terms of sex and games, and all this was new and intriguing to me. However, I must admit that knowing how much more experienced Boy Toy was at all this stuff meant that this was not only intriguing, but also kind of scary. I felt I wouldn’t know what the hell I was doing, and how could Boy Toy feel submissive then? I also wasn’t sure just how dominant I was. Seemed to me I was actually pretty submissive, as I had always tended to go along with my boyfriends’ plans. Come to think of it now, though, this worked for a while, in most of my past relationships, but on many occasions things came to an abrupt end when I got sick of being the follower. Why couldn’t things be my way sometimes? Were my wants not important? I was never very good at communicating this, it seems, because I’ve been through several break-ups following this pattern… Anyway, back to domination vs. submission. Instead of just plunging into the unknown without a clue, I did a lot of reading… And I decided to experiment: I played Boy Toy’s slave. Once. I remember vaguely that I was to be his slave for a whole 2 hours, because of some bet or game, or in exchange for something from him. This was all fine and fun, but deep down I was thinking “Great! I’ll learn!” How could I dominate him without first having been on the other side and knowing how it feels? This was a perfect excuse! Boy Toy started by giving me instructions for as soon as I walked into his place. There would be a chair in the middle of the room, and I was to strip naked, put my clothes on the chair, then go kneel on the couch and wait for further orders. That’s all I knew beforehand. So at the appointed time, I showed up and did as ordered. I soon found myself naked, kneeling on his couch and wondering what the hell I had gotten myself into. It felt pretty unnerving, not knowing what he had planned for me. Boy Toy approached me and took a moment to admire his naked slave. The first thing he did was to lock a slave collar on me. He then ordered me on all four, and blindfolded me. I was instructed not to move. If you’ve never been in a situation like this, I recommend you try it! To be exposed and at someone’s mercy like this was like nothing I had ever experienced before. But I have to admit, it did turn me on. Maybe there was something in this, after all... Boy Toy made me hold this specific position, with my back arched so my ass was sticking up and exposed, with my eyes still covered, while he proceeded to feel me and caress me. He took out what I later saw was a sort of slender bamboo pole and lightly brushed it along my body, and finally teased my pussy with it, sometimes rubbing it and sometimes playfully tapping it. Still, I wasn’t allowed to move. After a bit more of this, Boy Toy allowed me to move and get the blindfold off. He shackled my wrists with chains and ordered me to go open a bottle of wine, and pour ourselves a glass each. One of the things that stuck in my memory the most was that when pouring the wine, he rebuked me for not doing it “properly”. He showed me how it should be done, saying “this is how my little slave pours my wine”. We then sat on the couch, drinking our wine, while he smoked a cigarette. Once again, he took the time to admire his little slave. He started looking me up and down, fussing over me, examining my hands and saying things like “I think I like ALL of you. Yup, I like every inch of you.” This went on for what felt like quite a while. After this “break”, Boy Toy announced that he had planned a dirty photo shoot for me. He made me wear a g-string, army boots and a beret hat, and climb on his kitchen counter. He directed spots on me, and he went on directing me into all these naughty poses, while he took pictures. We also took some without the g-string, and with a cowboy hat. To be honest, I hated the beret, I thought it looked awful on me, but I was his slave, I couldn’t argue ;) The shoot went on for a little while, then the 2 hours were over and I was my own self again, no longer Boy Toy’s little slave. I remember thinking at the time that he hadn’t done a lot, he hadn’t taken advantage of it very much. But later, with more knowledge and understanding, I came to suspect he had put a lot of thought and planning into this. I came to realize that pretty much all he did during those 2 hours had a goal: to make me feel specific things. To make me feel inferior to him, to objectify me, to show me who was in control… His telling me how to pour the wine, for instance. Or when we sat on the couch and he admired me for so long. That was to objectify me. Everything he did was geared towards giving me a certain experience, and making me understand he owned me. He planned all this around me and around how it would make ME feel. And this led me to understand one of the attractions of submission, at least for me: to be doted and fussed upon by the Dom, to be the center of attention. I also know that part of it is to be completely and utterly free, without responsibility. Responsibility is solely in the hands of the Dom. It may sound the paradox, that to be someone's slave is freedom, but read about it, you'll see it said again and again. In my case, though, the experience was not long or intense enough, I believe, to feel this. This being said, quite frankly, I’m still not too keen on the idea of being told what to do and be punished if I fail! I think the punishment part is what puts me off the most. Just don't like pain, either. But I know how much this turns Boy Toy on. So I’ve decided that I can be pampered and fussed upon another way, with the added bonus of not getting ordered around and punished. I can simply order Boy Toy to spoil his Owner.

Boy Toy has such a wonderfully devious, kinky, creative and submissive mind, and it does its best work in his dreams. Frequent, vivid dreams. In his dreams, I am always a total dominatrix bitch and I make him do all sorts of extreme stuff. There is a difference between fantasy and real life, some things are just not realistic or possible. Dreams let Boy Toy live all his wildest fantasies. This is great for me, because it puts him in a submissive frame of mind without my doing anything, AND it gives me plenty of great ideas. One of my favourite things to do is talk dirty to Boy Toy before going to bed, and ask him about his dreams the next morning… It almost never fails.

I have decided on a new rule for Boy Toy: he must tell me every time he has a kinky dream, and I will post them here.

So here is the one he had last night:

You are telling me that I have been hypnotized to make when I’m “in session” go smoother and I am kinda not sure it has worked. Then before I know it I'm standing naked in front of you in a… position, and have cuffs on me in certain places.  And I’m saying to you "This can't be", and I’m rather worried as to how effective this hypnosis thing is. Then you are telling me that I'm “in session” right now, that I can't exit until you release me. I’m not sure if you’re talking about the cuffs all over me, just one of them or a key word that will release me of the hypno thing, as I’m “in session” and I am not being allowed to know too much about it. The next part I remember, you are saying "Do you feel, in your legs and butt, that close to orgasm feeling? That’s part of it, too." And I remember feeling this sensation, up my legs and butt, and thinking "Damn she is right! This must be the ultimate form of control, holy shit!!!" ... And I kept questioning it, like trying to prove to myself it wasn't true or something. And all I can feel is that I'm totally submissive and it's almost impossible to hesitate or play the brat to your commands. Then you say that if I cum, I would no longer be in session and that you had to make sure I didn't cum and I’m thinking "that's gotta suck"! Next thing I know I'm in this really revealing position on the floor or on a table or something, my eyes are closed but I can hear you in a sort of soft echo and I’m wondering if this is hypno-mode or something. You are saying stuff like "Don't be scared... I can take you out whenever I want... But you knew the rules before you agreed to this..." At this, I feel this fear that punishment has no limits, and I remember feeling scared a little or fucked and I was shaking but saying to myself "do what she wants as best as possible"... Or something like that kind of thought, like an internal battle mixed with the thought “she has won”... I felt there was no possible way out and I was at your mercy.... Next part, I can see again and you’re looking right in my eyes and I feel like you are invading me and you’re telling me that this position is more then the cigarette position [note from Elle: Boy Toy and I have a cigarette contract according to which he must smoke kneeling naked in front of me, with legs spread] and you talk about inspection, that that is what you'll call it. You made me get up, and then you said inspection, and I felt shy about it, but had to do it and you made me get up and get into “inspection position” again and again, with me feeling shy and feeling bad that I was resisting, obstructing your goals, conflicting with your plans…  Then I'm thinking I got a spanking but I can't really remember, just sort of a feeling that you didn't want to give an inch. And after, I'm checking the marks on my butt, all alone in the bathroom and thinking “Shit! She isn't fucking around!" Then this part is spooky. I'm walking back out of the bathroom and I'm looking for you. I can only see your back and you’re staring at a table in front of you. And I wait there for you to call me... And then you do, and you tell me to come and get into the cigarette position on the table in front of you. And as I do, I notice a strap-on, plugs of all sizes... And I'm kinda hesitating to get close to you when you have that. So you tell me that using this really turns you on and that I'd have to accept it and be trained. Apparently the butt plugs were for training while you weren't there! You were telling me that I'd practice, while in session, once a day so you could like urm... fuck me, rape me, enter me at any time, as it was really hot for you. I remember asking myself "I don't remember this about her, she never mentioned it before, did it just develop recently or she always liked it...?" But I was feeling really... obedient so I might get out of it. Then I remember asking how I could be in session when you weren't here and you let on that would be done by phone, like apparently you’d call and I'd go into session, practice, and only when you would call back would I be out. And I remember that making me a little nervous… Later, we are sitting with friends, and having this massive fucking feast. And I’m seeing you and thinking of this “in session” thing and feeling sort of like "she has me by the balls", can't remember my exact train of thought but I remember you were just looking at me, it was very scary how confident you seemed sitting there with a little evil smile on your face... evil but cute.

Oh and there was this other part, you were going to blog about my urm... anal training and I really didn't want you to. That’s all I remember.

My relationship with Boy Toy is a lot of fun and games, but it’s also real, normal life. We do spend fairly long periods of time leading a totally normal life, with the vanilla sex and nothing more. Boy Toy says it’s good to take a break from kink from time to time, and I agree. I can’t imagine being Little Miss Dominatrix all of the friggin’ time! And then there’s play. This last year, for me, has been a lot about exploring, discovering, pushing boundaries, getting to know myself, as well as Boy Toy, better. More and more, I am finding these domination tendencies in me. Sometimes I realize that I get frustrated if Boy Toy doesn’t do as I wish, but at the same time, I don’t really do what it takes to enforce it. I need to make what I want clear, and punish him if he strays. Don’t look at me that way, he loves it! Let me tell you about the most recent punishment I put him through, you’ll see. I had made these new rules for him, and he broke one. Nothing serious, but I knew that if I didn’t do anything about it, he’d just keep on being a brat and pushing his limits, just to see how far I’d let him go. Basic male psychology. Or rather, basic Boy Toy psychology ;) Anyway, the next day, he was going to a friend’s place to work on some stuff so I decided that as punishment, he would wear the ball cuff. It is fairly heavy and weighs him down, so he feels it constantly and knows who’s boss! But… He left in a hurry and forgot to put it on! Later that day, we had some of my friends coming over to hang out before hitting the club. So I told him he’d have to wear the ball cuff to go out. Well, you probably guessed it already, he forgot again. Now that did it! How could he forget something I told him to do? I would have to punish him for that. And I had the perfect idea! A few days later, I put my plan into motion. I told him to come over and bring the Remote control vibrating butt plug, with the Anal plug harness (the thing won’t stay in unless he wears the harness to hold it there). Needless to say, he was worried and admitted to feeling chicken about this. But I held my ground and told him he had to do this. Before he arrived, I went to get stuff to make us supper, and a good bottle of red wine. I got back home, marinated the steaks in the wine, put candles in the bathroom and got into some clothes I knew he’d find sexy. Boy Toy arrived late, something had come up. I was sitting in the living room, reading, and when he came in and started looking hesitant, I said “Are you gonna put it on, now?” He said “Now?” to which I replied, firmly, “Now.” He obediently walked into the bathroom and closed the door. Several minutes later (it seems like complicated business, putting the butt plug in, what with the harness and all), he came out wearing nothing but the harness and the plug and just stood there piteously, looking shy (how cute!). I asked him for the remote control and the first thing I did was test it. His jump, blush and squirming were proof enough that it worked! And then I set him to work. I had him draw me a bubble bath and light the candles. While I luxuriated in the hot, bubbly water, I had him cook us supper. And I told him “I’ll buzz you if I need you”, to which he blushed. I LOVE making him blush, it's one of my favourite things. I waited a few minutes before buzzing him, to give him time to start on supper. Then I took the remote control and pushed the “on” button. He arrived fairly quickly, saying “Yes, my owner?” (that’s his little pet name for me). ”Boy Toy, I need a glass of wine”. And then, as an afterthought: “Oh, you can pour yourself one, too”. So I relaxed in the bath, with a nice glass of wine, while Boy Toy slaved in the kitchen. When I got out of the bath, the food wasn’t ready yet so I sat on the couch, reading. I’d buzz him every once in a while but he was getting used to it by then and he wouldn’t even react! At one point I sneaked up right behind him and pushed the button. Nothing. Humph, was that thing working? I had to check! So I grabbed his butt, and sure enough, I could feel it vibrating inside there, right through the cheek! We had a great meal. He really is an awesome cook, I’m very lucky. By the time we sat down to eat, though, he told me the butt plug was starting to hurt him so I allowed him to take it out. I told him he still had to do as I say, though. And he still had to be naked. Once we were done eating, I stripped naked and had him give me a massage. I was a bit disappointed that I couldn’t buzz him while he was massaging me, but it was still nice. He used massage oil I have here, which smells very good. Afterwards, we just lay together in bed, naked, and I decided to experiment. I started running my fingers and nails lightly all over his chest, sometimes lightly grazing his penis and balls. He was getting aroused, but just a little. So I started talking. I wanted to see just how much the idea of me controlling and punishing him turned him on. My leg was pushed up right against his penis, and I could feel him react every time I said things like “I should punish you more” or “You won’t forget to do things I tell you to do, from now on, right?” Conclusion? Definite reaction on his part. Will use this against him in the future. Finally, he was so worked up that he couldn’t resist any longer and he pulled me on top of him. I guided him in me and started moving up and down. He was so excited I could tell he was going to orgasm really fast. I said “Don’t come!” and he said “Ok… please stop moving then”. I slowed down for a few seconds… Then I had my first orgasm and it almost drove him over the edge. He asked me if he could come now, I said no but started moving even faster, knowing this would get him into trouble. Sure enough, he couldn’t take it anymore and as he came, I had my second orgasm. Then, as I was still straddling him, I said, in as strict a tone I could muster, “I thought I told you not to come!?!” But I couldn’t keep the act up and I burst out laughing. How can I stay mad when it was such hot sex? I think I need to punish him more often.

I’m still new to the blogging world, but apparently you don’t have to be around for a very long time to run into HNT: Half-Nekkid Thursdays. At first, I didn’t know what it meant, until someone else helpfully asked Tom from The Edge of Vanilla. For the full story on HNT, go here. So, without further ado, here is my first HNT picture! Be nice to me, it’s my first time ;)    

One issue I’ve struggled with ever since dating Boy Toy is how much more experienced he is at kink, fetishes, D/s... Submitting to me excites him immensely, but it is a little intimidating to dominate someone who’s almost seen it all, while I was just this innocent little girl. Well not completely innocent, but almost. Add to that the fact that I am a rather insecure person, and you can imagine that it wasn’t always easy. And since I am of the worrying type, I just had to come up with all kinds of reasons to worry, right? For a long time I was convinced that I’d just bore him. I mean, this guy has had some very fucking dominating girlfriends. He’s only told me a little about his past experiences, too, so I told myself that what I did know was just the tip of the iceberg. This fear of boring him may very well have come from my belief that when you’re into kink, with time, it takes bigger and wilder things to get you the same level of thrill… A co-worker of mine sort of told me this recently. Anyway, I think that’s what she was trying to tell me, in a roundabout way. She couldn’t really tell me, you just don’t say that kind of things to your co-workers! But I’ve been thinking about what she said, ever since. Then goodhubby, from The Chastity Experiment, expressed the same thing quite well in one of his replies to me on his and his wife’s blog: "Unfortunately, as anything becomes commonplace, more "extremes", or at least different extremes become necessary to keep the edge." So I don’t know. Was I right to be scared of this? Sounds like other people believe this to be true. But in that case, Boy Toy would be bored silly by now, wouldn’t he? Or maybe I just had a misconception of what is hardcore and what isn’t. Since I had never done anything very kinky before Boy Toy, I had this image of myself, this idea that I was a boring, normal, regular person, sexually speaking. And this idea stuck. So every time I did something new and naughty with Boy Toy, I saw it as something just a little playful, slightly wilder than average. It was never a “big deal”. Even now, I often ask Boy Toy if he’s bored of me yet. However, this is a little bit his fault since at the very beginning, he told me he gets bored easily in bed… You can’t tell me things like that and expect them not to stick in my brain. It’s sad, but true. One day though, when I asked him that and I expressed my worries that I wasn’t intense or hardcore or dominating enough for him, he reminded me that I had just kept him locked up in a chastity device for five days, denying him any orgasm while I was away for business, and that this, for him, was really hardcore. Ah. I guess I just don’t give myself enough credit. After all, he’s still with me, and apparently, far from bored. So, going back to what goodhubby said, I think Boy Toy and I ARE evolving in our kink, and keeping the edge. But we’re doing so at a pretty slow pace; otherwise he’d be locked up 24/7 or into a binding slave contract, by now. Makes me wonder where we’ll be in 10, 15 or 20 years from now? Hmmm…

It’s a little late and I've got to go to work tomorrow, but I'm not really sleepy. So instead of tossing and turning I decided to do a little reminiscing… and writing. This blog has had me thinking a lot about my relationship with Boy Toy, how it started and how it’s evolved since. How I’ve evolved, too. When we first started seeing each other, Boy Toy and I, we agreed this was just for fun, for the time being. Maybe it’d go somewhere, maybe it wouldn’t, but there wouldn’t be any pressure. Part of this, I believe, was because I was a “kink virgin”. I remember Boy Toy telling me he didn’t think he could have a serious relationship with someone who wasn’t into kink or fetishes. That this was an important element for him, one he didn’t think he could do without. I imagine he didn’t want to give me false hopes, gentleman that he is. I guess also that the “keeping this not serious” part was because he didn’t want me to feel pressured to get down and dirty. I know he was very hesitant at first to even have a fling with me, and he certainly did not jump on me the first chance he had. Only the second :P He was being careful, for my benefit. He didn’t put any pressure on me to get into kink. He didn't even dream that'd I'd get into it! Or did he? Obviously, if he was to turn me into his kinky Queen, he would do it in a subtle way, or else I’d be too frightened and overwhelmed. And if this is indeed what he did, I think he did it by introducing me to Elise Sutton. When he told me about Elise Sutton, I started reading from her website, almost obsessively. Ms Sutton is, in her own words, a lifestyle Dominant Woman who believes in Female Supremacy and who practices Female Domination. By the way, my female friends, if you decide to pay her website a visit and read off of it, be careful! When I first did, I read so much of it, it almost brainwashed me and I’d get pissy with Boy Toy if he didn’t do what I wanted! I relaxed with this after a little while ;) I do have some dominant tendencies, but just in play, really. When it comes to real life, it’s a different story. I think. But anyway, where was I going with this? Oh, yeah. Reading her site, I came upon her article How To Introduce Your Wife or Girlfriend To The Female Domination Lifestyle and suddenly, I had this nagging doubt. Let me paste part of it for you: […] Another thing that you can do to seduce your wife's dominant nature is you can offer to give her foot and body massages. When she gets home from a hard day's work, don't sit and watch television and ignore her. A submissive exists to tend to his superior wife's needs. Go and kneel next to her, take off her shoes, and rub her tired feet. As she relaxes in pleasure, work your massage up  her legs and massage and lightly scratch her legs. Do this on a consistent basis. While you are doing this, tell her that you love and adore her. Tell her that you exist to serve her. Eventually, you might take more liberty as you rub her feet. You might start to kiss and lick her feet. I wouldn't do this the first time, but if she responds positively to the massages, then keep adding to them. You might work your kissing and licking from her feet, up her legs, and then to her crotch. That's right, get in the habit of orally servicing your wife. Kiss her body all over and make love to her with your mouth and tongue. Do not ever penetrate her with your penis, unless she requests it. Do not focus on your needs, but instead focus on her needs. Please her sexually as your Queen. Remember that she is superior to you. Don't you dare ever take any liberties, without her permission. Eventually, you might want to buy a vibrator or a dildo and you can please her with it. […] Wow! Boy Toy frequently gives me nice, relaxing massages. Sometimes foot rubs. He often cooks wonderful meals for me. He loves oral sex and pleasures me that way often. And at the time, he had just bought me a vibrator. Sound familiar? It certainly looked like he was following Ms Sutton’s advice and trying to “introduce” me to a female domination lifestyle. I did feel like a Queen. So I sent Boy Toy the link to the article, and jokingly asked him if that was what he had been doing. He denied it, of course… I’ve actually mentioned it to him again recently, and he doesn’t even remember reading the article at all. I just think it’s kind of funny. I really do believe he had never read it, back then, and it was just a coincidence that whatever he was doing sounded so much like what Elise Sutton advises. What can I say, I’m just a lucky, spoiled Queen, with a great Boy Toy.

As I was saying in my first post, until I started dating Boy Toy about a year ago, I had never been very wild at all when it comes to sex. I mean, I had sex, don’t get me wrong, but it was all very normal. I’ve done a lot of things for the first time, since that fateful night last summer. My Boy Toy drew me out of my shell, so to speak. It started with pictures. That, I had done before. I was seeing a guy for a while and one of our kicks was to take naughty pictures of ourselves and send them to each other. Ok, so nothing new here, nothing scary. What was a little different with Boy Toy was that I’d make him work for the pictures. I would take very sexy pictures of myself, pictures I knew he’d love, and I would send them to him, but on some conditions! A massage in exchange for a few pictures, for example. Or I would give him an assignment. This was fun, and still familiar territory. He seemed to really love the pictures and that helped me feel more confident, and perhaps more bold. It drew some playfulness and dominance out of me, what with giving him assignments… And one particular assignment I gave him led me to buy my first sex toy! I had taken a particularly hot batch of pictures, and in exchange I asked him to tell me 3 things that turn him on. I was pretty proud of my idea because I wanted to have some leverage, I wanted to know how to really turn him on… I had asked him similar questions before but he’d always say that it was more fun if I found out on my own. Imagine my surprise when it took almost a whole evening of chatting for him to explain his turn ons! Forget the simple things like, a girl wearing boots, or being touched a certain way. No. For Boy Toy, arousal is very much in the head. That was new! I mean, he had told me so before, but this is when I started to really see it… I’m sure it’s true for most people, too, but I guess I just hadn’t thought of it that way before. So his turn ons were more like situations. Two of them, I’ve done since. One is just not something I’m interested in. I can’t say never… but I highly doubt I’ll ever do it ;) But the one that interests us for this particular story is this: we’re out in public and I’m wearing a remote control vibrator, while he holds the remote. Ohhhhh! How naughty! But not too over the top for me, good start. Besides, this was all very new and exciting, and I felt like we were two naughty conspirators. I just couldn’t stop now! Not long after he told me this, I was out of town visiting a friend and oh, coincidence, we went to a sex shop. Ok, maybe it was my idea. Anyway, while my girlfriends were shopping for good old dildos and vibrators, I bought a Remote control vibrating egg. My friends and I all took turns holding it and feeling it vibrate and marvelling at it and they probably all thought I was crazy, knowing how I’d use it… And we did try it, pretty much as soon as I got back in town. It was somewhat disappointing, unfortunately. I mean, the idea of going to a club with the egg in me and the remote control in my Boy Toy’s pocket is really exhilarating. But the vibrations are felt from the inside, which just didn’t do much for me. While it was fun exchanging conspiratorial glances every time he pushed a button, I didn’t get turned on much. And the batteries die really quickly, and are super expensive. When I decided to buy all new batteries to replace the ones in the egg and in the remote, it cost me up to $20. Add that to the $80 I paid for the egg, it was getting expensive. We did run into another problem with it, too. At one point, the remote control stopped working, so the egg just kept on vibrating. We had a good laugh at that one. We were leaving the club, picking up our coats at the coatcheck… Our conversation went something like this: Me: Ok, you can stop it now… Him: I did. It’s still going? Me: Yes. Him: Now? Me: Still going. Him: Now? Me: Still… Him: What about now??? I think it’s not working anymore… Fun times. It ended up stopping by itself, just a few minutes later. It’s not as bad as it sounds, you become sort of numb to the vibrations and sometimes I couldn’t even tell if it was vibrating or not! But I think the worse thing that happened while wearing it was… Well, I needed to go to the bathroom. I think you can all guess what happened… LOL  So I had to pick it out of the toilet. But I couldn’t bring it to the sink and wash it, there were other girls there. So I wiped it as well I could with toilet paper, threw it in my purse, and when I came back out I told Boy Toy that it was no use pressing that button… I don’t think I’ve used the egg since. The idea was great but the toy just doesn’t work for me. Still, not too bad for a start, no? We’ve been talking ever since of getting the Remote control butterfly vibrator, but just haven’t gotten around to it. It looks like it vibrates in just the right spot… I am adding it to my Wish List right now :D